Stuff About Cars

Yep, it’s been a bloody bad week for roadworks. Further to my earlier moan about how much time I spend in the car, this week I’ve queued to the point of insanity at least three mornings and two evenings. Latest calculation (normal+roadworks+other odds-and-sods) is that this week I’ll spend 16 hours behind the wheel.

13.85 % of my waking week! I can’t stand it!

Just for a change, here’s something that I though was quite informative…

But don’t think that means I’ve finished complaining. This is just something for you to read while I get my breath back!

A Comprehensive Introduction

1: The UK Number Plates System

This section explains what the characters on a number plate mean, and how the current display format differs from older systems

There have been several numbering systems used since motor vehicle registration first started in the first years of the 20th Century. Things got off to a fairly uncertain start, with variations to the original numbering system appearing in some regions. However, it is generally true to say that the very early number plates consisted of a letter code denoting the issuing authority, and a sequential identification number. Unlike more recent versions, this first generation of number plates had no year identifier. 

Demand for registrations grew as the number of vehicles on UK roads increased, and a slightly more flexible format was devised, which would provide more information about the vehicle. This new format retained the principle of the regional identification letters, and the sequential ID number. The greatest innovation was the addition of a letter code at the end of the plate which indicated the year of issue. This had two major benefits: it enabled people (including prospective purchasers of used cars) to determine the age of a vehicle, and it meant that the number sequence used to identify individual vehicles could be reused each year, as the year letter would change. Because of the placing of the year code at the end of the character string, these new plates became known as suffix number plates.

The next significant change, when the suffix series had run its course, was a very simple one: the format of the registration number was simply reversed so the whole process could start again from the beginning! An example of the suffix format would be EXE 456L; in the new system the format would be L456 EXE, with the year letter coming first, followed by the unique ID number and the letter group, including the region code. Unsurprisingly, as the year letter came at the start, this generation of plates became known as prefix number plates.

With the number of vehicles constantly increasing, the prefix system soon exhausted the combinations available, and yet another number plate format was required. In September 2001 the current style of UK vehicle registration plates was introduced. The current number plate format consists of a two-letter regional identifier called the “local memory tag”, a two-digit year code or “age identifier” and finally a three-letter “random element which provides the specific identification for each vehicle. An example of this current format is the registration BD51 SMR. “BD” is a code for Birmingham, 51 is the code for September 2001. SMR is a random letter combination which will be assigned to only one registration issued in any one area during any one “age identifier” period, thus uniquely identifying the vehicle to which it is applied.

Another important change is that registrations now change twice a year instead of once. The use of a two-digit code instead of a single letter allows for many more permutations, thus extending the useful life of the current scheme.

2: Number Plates Display Regulations

This section explains the rules that set out how we are allowed to display number plates

When the new registration format was introduced in 2001, regulations governing the construction and display of car number plates were revised. These revised regulations apply to the number plates on any and all vehicles registered on or after 1st September 2001. They also apply to all replacement plates made and mounted on vehicles on or after the same date.

Number plates must now use one specific, mandatory typeface - a very simple sans serif typeface intended to make the numbers easy to read by both humans and automatic recognition systems which are increasingly being used by the police and other agencies. All hard-to-read variants such as multiple stroke and italic fonts are now prohibited. The one decorative variation still permitted is a 3D effect version of the mandatory typeface. Specifics of size and spacing are:

• Each character must be 79mm high and 50mm wide (except the number 1 or the letter I)
• The width of each character stroke must be 14mm
• There must be a space of 11mm between characters within the same group
• Character groups must be 33mm apart.

Optionally, number plates may display one of the following national emblems:

• British Union Flag with “GB”
• English Flag (St George Cross) with “ENG”
• Scottish Flag (St Andrew Cross) with “SCO”
• Welsh Flag (green dragon on green/white field) with “Wales” and “Cymru”
• Euro Flag (circle of stars) with “GB”. If the Euro/GB configuration is displayed, then the bearer vehicle need not display a separate “GB” emblem when driving within the EU.

The colours and reflectivity of number plates are also specified in the regulations, and there is a British Standard (BS AU 145d) which describes the physical characteristics of number plates, including: visibility, strength and reflectivity. Front plates must have black characters on a white background, while rear plates must have black characters on a yellow background. The British Standard also requires that a number plate must be marked with the following information: the British Standard Number, the name, trade mark, or other means of identification of the manufacturer or component supplier, the name and postcode of the supplying outlet. A non-reflective border is optional. There may be no other markings or material contained on the number plate.

3: Personal Number Plates

We explain what personal number plates are… and what they are not

Personal number plates are not number plates which contain the letters that spell out a name or word. The registration system used in the UK isn’t that flexible.

On the other hand, the number/letter combinations that are permitted on UK plates allows surprising scope for the approximation of names and words. This is achieved by the natural similarity between certain numbers and letters, and by the tendency of the human eye and mind to seek familiar patterns. By way of illustration, most readers will be able to deduce why a London plumbing company has equipped one of its vans with the registration DR4 1N. The resemblance is clear, even if the word isn’t actually spelled out. That one small example pretty much sums up the principle. Of course, there are other kinds of plates sought by car owners: some want their initials, while others like to incorporate a meaningful number. The message is sometimes clear, as in the example above: sometimes it is deliberately cryptic, and only the initiated can share the joke.

In the UK it is permitted to buy and sell the rights to display registration numbers, and thus to transfer numbers from one vehicle to another. There is some paperwork involved, and some conditions that must be satisfied but, with the assistance of a specialist company, the process is fairly fast and easy.

4: Registration Transfers: Procedures and Regulations

What you need to know if you want to buy or sell number plates

If you own a car which is registered and has a number plate, well, you could sell that registration number if you wanted to. Similarly, you could buy another and re-register your vehicle with the new number. It is a little more complicated than just changing the plates that are displayed on the car: the correct paperwork needs to be completed and the proper conditions complied with, in order for the whole thing to be legal. While the process is not hugely complicated, there are a number of potential pitfalls awaiting the unwary, so it really is advisable to engage the services of a professional company, such as http://www.regtransfers.co.uk to assist with the formalities.

The following conditions must be satisfied in order for a transfer to take place.

• Both the donor vehicle (the one from which the number plate is being taken) and the recipient vehicle (the one to which the number plate is being moved) must have current tax and MOT
• The recipient vehicle may not be older than the year on the number plate that is being transferred to it. In other words, it is not allowed to make a vehicle seem younger than it really is by changing the registration number
• If a car is to be sold, written off, or otherwise disposed of, the registration will be lost unless it is transferred from that vehicle before disposal. In the case of a write-off, the registration is not just lost to its former owner - it is lost altogether and cannot be reused.

It is possible to buy a registration, even if no vehicle is available to receive it. For example, a car owner may have a treasured personal number plate, but may wish to sell his/her car. If a replacement car is not ready, it is possible to transfer the registration from the current bearer vehicle onto a certificate of entitlement known as a Retention Certificate. When a vehicle becomes available, the number may then be transferred from certificate to the car - subject to the conditions described above. Registrations may actually be held on certificate indefinitely, so long as the certificates are renewed - a process that involves a modest fee payable to the authorities.

A professional company will be able to take care of all these points. The transfer process generally proceeds without problem and fairly speedily. Timescale is usually measured in days, with the main delays being simply the time taken for the necessary paperwork to be posted to and from the authorities.

So, there we are. This is a fairly comprehensive, yet concise, guide to the basics of UK number plates and personalised registrations. Of course there is a lot more to learn, but the information presented here should help the reader to avoid problems with displaying number plates legally. It should also help the reader to go into any registration transfers situation with at least a basic understanding of what is involved.

If further information or assistance is required, www.regtransfers.co.uk is the UK’s leading independent number plates expert. Advisors are available to help between 8am and 11pm, 7 days a week on 01582 477333.

At the moment there’s a lot of talk about 4×4 (SUV) vehicles in towns. Because many of them are large, with correspondingly thirsty engine capacities, they are getting some stick from eco-warriors. There are also safety issues - apparently getting hit by a large 4×4 at any given speed is likely to do more damage to the inattentive pedestrian than a similar impact by a Nissan Micra or a Reliant 3-wheeler… or something. Clearly the best policy is to avoid getting flattened by vehicles of any type, but if that proves too difficult then one should aim to get run over by a small hatchback or saloon model.

I’m actually straying from the point I was trying to make. Perhaps that would be for the best, as my point is hugely trivial and doesn’t even begin to approach the importance of road safety in the great scheme of things. Nevertheless, I’ll press on regardless…

I drive a very small, very cheap Japanese 4×4. It is relatively eco-friendly with its 1300 engine, so I don’t get any criticism when I drive it into town to work. I do rather agree with those who think that large 4×4s are not really necessary for people who live and work in town and rarely travel out to the sticks.

I live in a small - no, tiny - rural village. It’s in the middle of nowhere, with narrow, potholed roads. Amongst the hazards for drivers are protruding tree branches, mud and horse manure all over the road, herds of deer, rabbits, weasels, badgers, pheasants and other undisciplined wildlife meandering around with no respect for one’s right of way. The roads flood a lot, and in the winter they often become impassable due to drifting snow.

Just as I don’t really understand why urban drivers need big, tough 4×4s, I really don’t see why people who live in my neck of the woods drive around in vulnerable, fragile, expensive, boutique vehicles. What is more, I wish they bloody wouldn’t.

What sense is there in driving through rough, muddy, narrow country lanes, where you are almost certain to meet the one daily bus coming the other way, if you are in a top-of-the-range Mercedes, Ferrari or Porsche? It’s going to get muddy, scratched, and its suspension is going to take a hammering. To make it worse, these people drive in the middle of the road in a futile bid to avoid the unavoidable overgrown hedges and verges. They stubbornly refuse to move over, presumably thinking that they have some kind of priority over the local oik in his cheaper vehicle.

My patience is at an end. Not only will I no longer pander to this arrogance… I will begin a war of nerves. No longer will I move over. Either they do or no one does. I can live with a few scratches on my £9000 Jimny. We’ll see who is best equipped for the environment.

Mwoah ha ha ha! (That’s supposed to be diabolical laughter, by the way…)

A while ago I heard someone say that if the little engine icon on the dashboard lights up then one should get the car checked over pronto, in case it explodes or turns into a Fiat Panda or something…

Well, a few weeks back the little icon lit up in my car. It had flickered before, but this time it stayed on. So, I got my friendly local mechanic to have a look. No problem, he said. It’s not serious, you just need to put some cleaning stuff into the catalytic convertor - it’ll be cheap (he daren’t try to con me because I maintain his website!).

I was sceptical. After all, I had heard that this particular warning light always meant expensive disaster. Anyway, Andrew put the aforementioned “stuff” into the cat, the light went out and has not come back on since. What is more the car actually seems to be running better than it did before the problem with the sinister glowing engine icon.

 Don’t get me wrong, I’m relieved… but also a little disappointed. After all, with all the hype surrounding that little amber light, I was expecting an explosion at the very least.

It’s all very vague, isn’t it? A special light lights up to warn you that something - an unspecified something - is wrong with your car. I’d been led to believe that “something” was always serious and costly. It turns out that it can also be something minor and of no immediate importance. After all, when I first mentioned the light to my friend the mechanic he said: “If it’s running okay then don’t worry. Just keep driving it until I fit you in next week…”

Not that I wanted a serious fault, it’s just that I don’t see why they have to design instrument panels to scare the crap out of one unnecessarily.

This is really a continuation of the previous moan.

The same idiots who do the thing with the thumping sound systems (usually in naff little hatchbacks with tinted windows) aren’t satisfied with the level of mindless noise produced by their stereos - oh no, they need even more look-at-meeeee power from their cars. So, what do they do? They ramp up the macho growl from their 1300cc engines by fitting those stupid 4 or 5 inch diameter w*nker pipes.

Does it make them seem cool? No, it just sounds as if their car has failed its MOT…

At first I thought it was just me getting old, but then I heard people half my age complaining about the same thing, and I felt vindicated.

Can you guess what the topic of this post is, just from the title?

Those tragic little pillocks with their booming in-car sound systems. Believe me, I have looked into this - which means I interrogated my friend’s chavvy son-in-law, and my daughter’s idiot boyfriend (Hi, Terry!) - and the following facts emerge:

1) The vacuous crap that they play on these things is not always even the driver’s preferred kind of music. It is selected for pose value. Many of the drivers would never listen to it in the privacy of their bedrooms.
2) A lot of them can’t take the moronic din themselves, and they wear earplugs while they are driving.

These sound systems can cost an absolute fortune. Surely it would be cheaper and just as effective to spend £10 to get “Tosser” printed on a t-shirt…

It had to happen, so I thought I’d get it out of the way now. There is one topic that no car blog could avoid indefinitely… Road works.

Not a day goes by that I don’t hear them discussed by friends and colleagues. Yet, despite the constant debate and moaning, I have to confess that I don’t really understand them.

Why, after closing the roads between the office and my home for a week, is there nothing visibly different - except for the presence of an abandoned, mangled, men-at-work sign, lying by the kerb?

Why do the workmen still turn the “Stop” side of the sign around periodically, even when there is no traffic coming the other way?

Why do they go to such pains to make sure that they do road work on the alternate route at the same time?

Why do they always start with the roads where the surface is in least need of repair?

 As a post script to my very first post, let me add that I have, this week, spent about two hours queueing due to road works. That brings my in-car time this week to 14 hours - 12.12% of my waking time. Grr… 

I had heard that blogging has a dangerous effect on the psyche - that it became an outlet for all one’s darkest thoughts and anger…

It’s true. I’m angry already.

I’ve been searching for a car-oriented WordPress theme… and do you think I could find one (clue: look at this page)? That’s right. How did you guess? There must be one. In fact, there must be loads of them.

In the earlier post, when I couldn’t find the data I wanted I sort of produced material myself. To be honest, that’s not an option with this. I’ve written themes for the e107 CMS (a bit like a blog but with more extra stuff) and it always drives me mad.

If anyone can point me in the direction of some nice motoring-related themes, I’d be grateful.

Hi all,

Just what the world needs - another blog!

Well, there’s sort of a point to this one, so hopefully it’ll turn out to be a worthwhile exercise - or if not worthwhile, at least entertaining.

Have you ever thought about how much of their life the average lucky, materialistic westerner spends inside his/her car? There are probably statistics, but I couldn’t find them. I considered making them up, but someone would no doubt catch me out, so I abandoned that idea.

Not a good start for a fledgling blog - to be unable to come up with the figures that are supposed to justify its existence… OK, I’ll improvise.

Five days a week I drive to the office - the journey takes about 45 minutes. As I make a point of driving home again at the end of the day, that makes an hour and a half a day just getting to and from work. Saturdays I probably spend a similar amount of time driving into and around town. Sundays usually involve visiting, so the time spent in the car is probably about two or three hours. Let’s bear in mind that I am not someone who particularly enjoys driving, but nevertheless I spend at least 12 hours a week in the car.

Now, I calculate that, for me, there are approximately 115.5 waking hours in a week. If 12 of those are spent in the car, then it means that 10.39% of my conscious life is spent in a metal box.

In case you missed it: I spend 10.39% of my waking life in the damned car! And that’s without day trips to visit family spread around the country. Nor does it take account of holidays spent driving around Ireland. I simply don’t have the fortitude to face that much arithmetic.

So, back to justifying the existence of this blog. If I spend that much of my time on four wheels, then surely I must be able to find plenty to write about. Eh? Don’t you think?

I suppose we’ll soon see.