Uncategorized RoadWhinge on 01 Dec 2006 09:32 am
Bah, Humbug
This morning’s grumble is not strictly car-related, although it is prompted by seeing something in a car this morning.
I thought things were off to a good start. I left home 15 minutes earlier than I did yesterday and managed to miss quite a bit of the queue that drove me mad yesterday morning. So, I was a bit earlier, and it seems that one of the schools was closed for some reason, which also reduced the volume of cars milling aimlessly around the area. So, there I was, calm, content - almost serene.
Then I noticed the rear shelf of the saloon in front. Santa was standing on it. More specifically, a foot-tall Santa figurine was standing there, amongst some cotton wool snow and tinsel. I rolled my eyes, and sighed. Here we go, I thought. Oh well, at least this bloke waited until December to start assaulting me with his inane seasonal garbage.
Now don’t get me wrong. I love Christmas, but I only love it at Christmas. My window of seasonal tolerance and goodwill opens about two weeks before The Day and closes on Twelfth Night. Outside of that period, I consider anything Christmassy to be dissipating and devaluing the special quality of the season.
Still, I thought. This isn’t too bad, if a bit tacky.
I had just finished congratulating myself on my restraint and tolerance, when Santa dropped his strides, bent over, and mooned at me with an glowing red arse.
That does it. When I get home I’m going to break out the seasonal baseball bat.
Ho ho bloody ho.